What, me worry?

August 2023

Today, I am pondering fears.  Worries.  I am 60 years old and retired, financially secure and in good health.  Why should I worry about anything?  But I do.  I don’t think I know anyone that doesn’t.  And of course, “worry” is a very general term indeed.  I’m not talking about panic type worries but just general concerns that seem to occupy an inordinate amount of your thoughts. This has driven me to think lately about how “what” we worry about changes throughout our lives.  Not only that, but how worries themselves have changed over time.

When I was very young, people in my neighborhood were getting bomb shelters.  That, as well as the media of the day, led to me being concerned about nuclear war. Very worrisome for a child indeed. I also worried about Vietnam and the potential to get drafted and go to war. Another valid concern of the times. 

Of course, those fears went away and were replaced by other worries.  And those in turn were displaced by others.  And so it goes, throughout life.  Not always, but most of the time, my worries seem to be about things that are way out of my control.  Which fits very well with my Type-A controlling personality.

Nowadays, At least the last few months, I seem to fixate on things like El Nino and Climate change.  Heat waves and smoke from brushfires occupy my mind. Temperatures in Death Valley the other day reached 128 degrees, and the city of Phoenix has experienced a record-crushing 25 consecutive days of temperatures hotter than 110 degrees. Closer to home, we lie in the middle of a drought.  The lake near my summer home is nearing all time low levels. Some of this is totally unprecedented.    

I worry about plastic in our environment and have written rather extensively on this. But for me, my worries seem to center around my children and grandchild and how they will fare in a world that is changing so rapidly. How will they become financially independent and able to purchase their own home in a world that seems stacked against them in that regard?  How will they stay healthy both mentally and physically in a plastic-filled, smoke-inundated, hot world?  No joke intended.

On an equal level of concern, how can they manage to stay anxiety and depression free in a world that bombards them with continuous information and data, from sources designed to provoke an emotive response?  Of course, I am talking about cell phones and social media.  These tools are addictive by design, and their role often seems to be centered on the spread of misinformation on critical issues and the subsequent extremism this can drive. Not to mention how these tools power the need for immediacy of information and constant stimulation. Essentially mind control.

We must admit, these are concerning and worrisome, especially for someone from my generation.  As I pondered this, I started to think about how my modern worries differ from those of past generations.  Using my parents as reference points, I started to contemplate their world and the concerns they had, and voiced, as I was growing up. This would be mainly in the 1960’s and early 1970’s.

Our world today is full of issues, as described.  However, we tend to forget that the 1960s were one of the most turbulent and conflict-ridden decades in world history. The second decade of the 21st century is nowhere near perfect. But the 1960’s were very nearly anarchy.  Yes, right here in the good old U S of A.  The decade was characterized by the civil rights movement, the Vietnam War and associated antiwar protests, countercultural movements, and the emerging "generation gap”. Let’s just throw in the Cuban missile crisis as well. Assassinations were a hallmark of the era.  John and Bobby Kennedy, Martin Luther King, and Malcolm X, to name just a few.

The 1960s were also a time of sweeping movements to demand social justice. Protesters challenged the establishment for women's rights, racial equality, and demanded world peace. Riots were a common occurrence, as groups of people intent upon change expressed their views, some peacefully, many with the addition of violence. Counterculture movements were occurring where young people rejected the traditional values of their parents and fought for their own more enlightened agendas.

Meanwhile, there was a revolution in social standards, including clothing, music, drugs, and sexuality.  Civil rights became one of the most intense issues, practically dividing the country in two.  Even military duty, long an honor for Americans, was now questioned as the wars themselves were being fought with unclear objectives and justification.  Finally, schooling came to the forefront.  With both teachers and students demanding more rights and opportunities. 

It seemed that almost every social system was being challenged and the tension this caused in society was immeasurable. Moreover, for the first time in human history, it was all there for us to see.  Television was new and able to quickly showcase all these events as they occurred.  Essentially beamed right into your living room.

My parents were dealing with all these things as I was growing up.  Truthfully, I didn’t really recognize it.  I think they did a much better job hiding their apprehension and worries.  Not that they didn’t have anxiety, especially my mother, but they seemed to deal with them in a much more clandestine way. Let’s just say it was never discussed. 

Nowadays, it’s all out there for everyone to see.  It’s much more socially acceptable to talk about it as well as to seek treatment for it.  Back in the day, my mother used the term “spells” for her anxiety.  This was an expression used to intentionally hide both the fact that it was a panic attack and the reason for it.  As a kid I thought she was practicing witchcraft.  No kidding!

That might still happen, but not in my circles.  People openly talk about anxiety, panic, depression, and many other mental maladies.  Especially my kids.  Which is both heartening and anxiety provoking for me. At any given time, I know pretty much all of their worries and their mental condition.  Which it seems is often teetering on collapse. Until an hour later, everything is fine again.  But it still makes me worry!

Oh well, I guess it never really ends.  We are human after all. There is always going to be something to worry about, that’s for sure.  But I think it helps to reflect that it has always been that way.  The things we worry about may have changed but other worries are still there. And they will be for every generation to come.  A fact that is both sad and comforting at the same time.